Is your house full of objects and photos that bring back memories? Are they occupying too much emotional and physical space? Do you cringe and look away when you walk past your overstuffed china cabinet? It’s challenging to let things go; however, you can keep the memories and still lose the clutter. Read on to find out how.
Inheriting the Good, the Bad, and the Very Ugly
Many of us inherit items that make us feel deeply sentimental. But the truth is, a lot of those things don’t serve us well. They don’t fit our style or our limited space. Or, in the case of a green marble elephant statue that I inherited, some things are just plain butt-ugly. I’m here to tell you that it is okay to let go of inherited items (and gifts you don’t like). Your loved ones wouldn’t want you to be distressed by their stuff, would they? (And honestly, if they had decluttered like they should have, then you wouldn’t have their stuff.) Here are some pointers on rightsizing inherited memories:
- China: Consider keeping just one plate, or one teacup and saucer to display.
- Clothing: Do you wear any of it? Can something be tailored to fit? If not, vintage stores accept these as donations.
- Jewelry: If it’s real, you might want to have it appraised and insured. To keep or not to keep is a tough question. For example, I had a few pieces from my grandmother that I never wore. After struggling with massive guilt (I’m Greek, it’s deeply embedded), I finally sold it. The money went to our kids’ college fund (guilt alleviated). Another thought: Have a jeweler adapt pieces to make them more contemporary. You can sell costume jewelry to some vintage shops, in lots at O’Gallerie (a local auction house), or donate it to the Hillsboro Library Friends (sales benefit the public library).
- Artwork: My husband’s dad was an amateur painter, and we inherited many paintings. I hope my spouse doesn’t read this because I like being married, but I never liked his dad’s paintings. I encouraged John to put the paintings in his office, where he would enjoy them (instead of over the mantle, where I wouldn’t). Inherited art that doesn’t bring you joy? Then consign, donate, or sell it. Life is too short not to love what’s on your walls.
- Dust-catchers: Little statues, trinkets, photo frames, all those decorative items. Are they really your taste, or did you just get stuck with them? Again, you are allowed to let go of objects that don’t suit your life.
Life’s Memories (Don’t Be Buried by Them)
Along with inherited “treasures,” we collect sentimental souvenirs from our own lives—vacation souvenirs, greeting cards, vintage finds, and in my house, enough beach rocks to start our own beach. The list is endless. Unfortunately, storage isn’t. Too many things on too many shelves translate into clutter, not memories. Let your memories be selective. (You can always take a picture of these items to remember them by.)
When Parting is Such Sweet Sorrow
Most of us have one category of sentimental stuff that’s extra challenging to rightsize.
For me, rightsizing baby clothes was on par with chewing off my own arm. Give yourself grace to keep what’s too painful to part with. But not so much grace that you’re drowning in a sentimental stew. Find the balance, and you’ll lose some of the excess—and keep all the memories.
3-2-1-go!
So . . . Ready to do this? Set aside a day (or multiple days) and pick an area to rightsize. Take time to really think about which objects matter most to you (i.e., your “Big Rocks,” and gently let the others go. Just be mentally prepared. You will end up going on an emotional journey that slows your progress—and that’s fine. Take whatever time you need. You can take digital shots of special objects, greeting card messages, and so on. These can make it easier to let go. But . . . go where? Charities such as Goodwill and Habitat for Humanity accept a wide variety of items. They accept gifts with gratitude and provide a donation receipt for tax purposes. You can sell or consign valuable items with local consignors, too.
Oh, and here’s a challenge. Set a goal to get rid of, say, one-third of your stuff . . . and stick to your goal!
Another consideration: If you have kept sentimental items in the attic for years, then take it as a sign that it’s time to say goodbye.
And last: Ultimately, it’s just stuff!
Photos: Their Own Special Challenge
It’s weird to write about photo clutter, considering almost nobody gets photos printed these days. But many of us inherit mountains of photos, with more shoeboxes full than the average Nike employee. How do you cut down on the Kodak clutter?
- First, gather all your photos so you know how many you have.
- Then, think about how you want to sort them. For example, use a simple “keep/toss” sort to reduce the overall number of photos.
- Next, toss duplicate or blurry photos, or shots of people you don’t know (or set those aside for a relative who might recognize them). Consider ditching the landscape photos without people in them and vacation photos that are only meaningful to you (and future generations won’t appreciate). Recycling centers cannot accept photos, as photo paper contains chemicals.
- If you want to sort further, use categories such as vacation, family, holidays, and so on. You can also sort chronologically—whatever works for you.
- Sentimental photos of loved ones can be difficult to throw out. To make it easier, keep the very best and honor them by putting them into beautiful albums. Be sure to use archival photo albums.
- For photos that don’t merit placement in an album, but you still want to keep, use photo-safe boxes.
- Own lots of photos of extended family? Reach out to relatives to see if they would like some.
- Do you have young kids or grandkids? Similarly, consider making an album just for them, featuring grand and great-grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins, all labeled with their names. They’re all part of your family’s story, and it’s wonderful to share it with your kids or grandkids.
Going Digital
If you feel techy, scan your photos to keep on your computer, using an app such as Google PhotoScan (it’s free). The principles of sorting digital photos are essentially the same as physical photos. Create digital albums based on date, location, theme, pets, people—whatever you choose. (Or be like me and own 16,411 completely unsorted photos.) And remember to save your photos to a reliable hard drive or online cloud account. Have three copies in three different places for safekeeping.
Good luck with your journey down memory lane! Are sentimental objects and photos emotionally difficult to rightsize on your own? Let Big Rocks gently guide you through the process. Schedule a free exploratory call.
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About Andrea Thompson
Andrea was an advertising copywriter/creative director for 40 years before retiring, then unretiring to start a new career in organizing, then retiring again to travel the world with her husband, John. She fully admits her home is not 100% organized.